April 11, 2025

The middle of the night idea that saved my wife—twice

The more fear you feel around sharing your creation, the more your heart is in it.

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Breaking Point to Breakthrough

Long before my wife’s cancer diagnosis, she struggled with another health issue–intense asthma. I vividly remember the night it all came to a head. I got home late after a 14-hour workday at my fledgling escape room business. We were living in my brother’s spare bedroom in an attempt to make ends meet. As I approached the door, I could hear Carli wheezing. She was having a reaction to my brother’s chug (chihuahua and pug mix), and we couldn’t afford her $500 asthma medication. I nudged her awake and told her she needed to take a breathing treatment. Through the steam, Carli looked at me and said, “I have a crazy idea, but I'm scared.”

Our 2-year-old daughter was asleep on the floor, so Carli whispered her plans: She wanted to create a recipe book with the meals that helped her lose baby weight after our little girl was born. But this meant going back online with her fitness journey—something she'd tried before. When our families discovered her previous Instagram account with progress photos in workout clothes, they didn't see a woman helping others—they saw “pornography.” Devastated, she had deleted everything.

The $10 Recipe Book That Changed Everything

With nothing left to lose, we stayed up until 2 a.m. compiling recipes. Our eyes met in a final knowing glance, a silent "here goes nothing" passing between us as we posted the link to the recipe book on her account and went to bed.

The next morning told two stories: missed calls from angry relatives, and notifications from forty women who'd sent $10 each—$400 while we slept. Three months later, we moved into our own apartment and Carli found herself doing exactly what she was meant to do: being present for our daughter while helping other moms find their strength. Almost a decade later, no amount of money has felt as good as that first $400.

The word “embarrass” comes from “imbarricare”—to block or hinder. That's exactly what embarrassment does: builds walls between our inner truth and the outer world.

If we’d stayed afraid of criticism and embarrassment, Carli’s gift would’ve remained locked away, like Michelangelo’s David trapped in unsculpted stone. But she found the courage to chip away at what wasn’t hers, to reveal what was always waiting inside. She faced the critics, including her own inner voice of doubt, and found something better than approvalthe thrill that comes when your creation changes others’ lives.

The $10 meal plan that changed everything.

Beheading Your Inner Medusa

Our greatest creative expressions often emerge when we silence our inner critic. In Greek mythology, Medusa—once a beautiful priestess—was impregnated by Poseidon. The Goddess Athena, cursed her with snakes for hair and a glance that immediately turned anyone who locked eyes with her to stone. When Perseus later beheaded Medusa, Pegasus, the symbol of artistic imagination, sprang fully formed from her neck.

Consider the symbolism: Medusa couldn't release her creation until she lost her head—the very place where our logical mind and inner critic reside. Our fear of criticism runs so deep that we'd rather keep our gifts trapped inside than risk judgment. But we have to “cut off our own heads,” so to speak, and kill the inner critic that’ll always try to stop us from doing what we were meant to.

So now, ask yourself: What is the creation you’re too embarrassed to share?

I’d love to hear about it.

-Raleigh

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